Which makes you more nervous, a job interview or a first date?
Regardless of your answer, the two have a lot in common. One such commonality is the importance of telling good stories — an ability that can make or break your interview (or date). Below, author and talent acquisition specialist Dominic Bokich, explains how dating experience ties into job search success.
You say that experience in the dating world is relevant to success in the job search. Does this mean if I am terrible at dating that I’ll be terrible in the job search?
Definitely not. I would say that anyone who has ever gone on a date, whether good or bad, can be a good interviewee. The key is preparation and telling good stories. On a date, these tend to focus on travel, food, and family. In an interview, you should provide examples of past professional and educational successes, as they relate to the job description of the position you are interviewing for. Interviewers want those types of stories! That’s essential. It’s like being told what your dream date wants to hear. Having stories ready to go should make any job seeker more confident.
Is “love at first sight” something that can happen in job interviews? If so, is it a good thing or should we worry about clouded judgment on one or both sides?
HR people and hiring managers are good at faking it. Chemistry, that is, lol. We’re either super warm (to get you to open up and tell us who you really are) or very flat in an effort to receive data and process it. Having said that, we tend to leave our emotions out of the selection process. However, it’s important for an applicant to ask good questions, so their judgment won’t get clouded and they won’t make decisions based on feelings. I recommend asking one to three questions about the following topics: job duties, challenges facing the organization, and how the interviewer got to their position. The answers to these questions and other questions will help a job seeker determine if there is a fit or not.
It seems to me that chemistry is very important in both personal and professional relationships. Is there anything a job seeker can do if s/he senses the chemistry is off during a job interview?
When it comes to chemistry, hiring managers and HR reps know that there are different personality types. A good interviewer will focus on whether an applicant meets an organization’s values and has the skills to do the job. Then they will hire the person that they want to work with most. The key is to be yourself and not pretend to be someone else. Sometimes there just isn’t a fit and both parties need to keep looking.
You just found your dream job (guy/girl) and you’re filled with equal parts of excitement and anxiety. What kind of pep talk do you give yourself to keep your composure and nail it?
Great question! I love seeing excited applicants. It’s so refreshing! But, like a date, a successful interview requires a certain degree of composure. I recommend telling yourself that you need to determine whether you really like them and that you will have good information after the interview to make an informed decision. Then if you decide that this employer is “the one,” contact your desired organization every three to four weeks after the interview. Everyone can learn lessons from romcom films where a character gets obsessive and is then shunned by their love interest. That means don’t call and email everyday! But by all means, send a handwritten thank you note immediately after the interview to everyone you met with. That really shows the love.
How do you recover from a bad first date/interview?
I will confidently state that if you have seven interview “go-to” stories about your past professional successes, you won’t have a bad first interview. However, I know that not everyone will come prepared with that many good stories. So, my advice is to think of examples of when you’ve been praised at work, recognized, or saved the company money. Don’t have work experience? Talk about school projects you’ve worked on or school organizations you’ve been a part of. The days of memorizing, “I’m a hard worker and team player” are over and saying these things will get you nowhere.
Is there anything else you’d like to say on this topic?
The best advice I can give is to keep track of your professional and educational successes on a daily basis. Doing so will make you much more desirable to an interviewer and your resume will basically write itself.
Also, feel free to check out my book titled Sex and Your Job Search, which is entertaining, irreverent, and it works! I take the reader step by step through the job search process and help them create interview “go-to” stories based on their own experience. I include 30 Success Stories of people finding jobs in this economy, as well as 50 Funny Mistakes real applicants have made.
Dominic Bokich is author of the book Sex and Your Job Search: A Guide to Scoring Your Dream Job. He’s a talent acquisition specialist who hires an average of 1 person a day and his website, UrDreamJob.com, has useful and fun job searching tips.
Connect with Dominic on Twitter @DomBokich.
