Your friends, family, and professional mentors are probably trying to help, but at some point a running commentary on your job hunt can start to drive you crazy. If you’re tired of hearing these things, you’re not alone:
1. I told you to pick a different major
Who says it: Parent/Guardian
Why it sucks: Looking for a job is like dating – it’s personal, and sometimes suggestions from your parents can make you want to hide behind a bottle of wine in a dimly lit room. A lot of their advice can be helpful, but not if it is tinged with the poison of past ‘mistakes’ and comes with the dreaded I Told You So lecture. The fear that you could have done something in the past to make things better now is a total momentum killer, but keep in mind that only you really know what you want out of your next job. Remember that your career and job search are flexible. You can change your tactics or even your entire plan anytime you want. The only mistake you can really make is giving up.
What to do: Smile, nod, and sing a song in your head until they stop talking.
2. Did you ever hear back from [insert company you desperately wanted to work at that completely blew you off]?
Who says it: Acquaintances that can’t think of anything better to say
What you wish you could say: No, I didn’t hear back! Yes, that is just the most recent disappointment in a series of many! Yep, you’re right, that is a bummer! Thank you so much for bringing up the exact thing I am trying to distract myself from at every moment!
It’s natural for the people who care about you to want to find out how your search is going, but the conversation can often be difficult to navigate. What someone is essentially asking with this question is, ‘Have you been accepted, or rejected?’ Yup, they’re pretty much skipping through a minefield.
What to do: Try to hear the comment for what it is (a friend’s genuine interest) and not how it makes you feel (like a disappointing failure). If it really bothers you, let the asker know you’d prefer not talk about it because you fear you’ll be jinxing your odds.
3. Enjoy all the free time now – you’ll miss it when you have a job!
Who says it: Rude jerks
What you wish you could say: Yeah, I’m sure I’ll really miss sitting in my sweaty pajamas all day waiting for someone, anyone to call me for an interview, binging Netflix and eating food over the sink so I don’t have to do dishes. You’re right man this is the life!!!
What to do: Get away from this person as quickly as possible.
4. You will need an undergrad degree and 3+ years experience…for this entry level job
Who says it: Hiring managers who need a reality check
What you wish you could say:
Dear Sir or Madam,
Hello! I am writing to express my interest in your open position.
I see that the requirements stipulate a degree that takes four years to earn as well as three years of experience, and it also notes that the position is entry level.
Um, what?
How am I supposed to gain the experience for an entry level job when said entry level job requires experience to begin?
Please let me know how this makes sense at your earliest convenience.
What to do: Your best! Even if you don’t have the exact experience listed on the job ad, you may still be a great fit for the role based on skills and attributes the hiring manager doesn’t know about. If you think you’re capable, it never hurts to try. We’ve compiled some tips here if you need somewhere to start.
5. You’re overqualified for this job
Who says it: Hiring managers who just want to watch the world burn
What you wish you could say: Being overqualified means I can do the job. I applied for it because I want to do it. Please pay me to do it.
What to do: Though this reason might seem backwards to you, hiring managers do have their reasons for dismissing overqualified candidates; if you’re smarter than the job you’ll likely get bored easily and move on, creating more work and significant financial loss for the company when they are forced to fill your role again. Accept the rejection graciously, thank the company for their time, and ask them to keep you in mind for future opportunities.
6. How long have you been unemployed?
Who says it: Stone faced interviewers with a vice grip on your resume, and your nerves
Why it sucks: Going back to our job hunting-as-dating metaphor, this question can make you feel the same way you do when someone asks why you’re single if you’ve been out of the game for a while. You immediately feel totally unwanted, and want to start justifying and qualifying like mad. Not the best way to feel during a job interview (or a date, for that matter).
What to do: Formulate your answer just like you would if you’d been asked what your greatest weakness is – that is, use the question as an opportunity to highlight why you would be good for the job instead of allowing it to shatter your confidence. We’ve compiled a great guide to answering this very question right here.
7. Let’s go out! It’s not like you’re busy working!
Who says it: Your well-meaning friends and loved ones
What you wish you could say: Just because I’m unemployed doesn’t necessarily mean I have more free time – I’ve been volunteering, doing temp work to keep afloat, not to mention that job hunting itself is almost a full time job. Also, I’m broke. So unless you’re buying…
What to do: It’s frustrating when these kind of comments unintentionally make you feel like your friends think you sit around doing nothing all day – when in reality you’re tirelessly updating your resume and crafting personalized cover letters until your knuckles cramp. Still, just because you’re busy and funds are tight doesn’t mean you should stop being social. In fact, burrowing away in your den of joblessness is the last thing you should do. For one, you could miss out on opportunities in your network. More importantly, you’ll just get kinda depressed, dude. You know that feeling you get when you’ve been online doing nothing for hours and the laptop screen finally goes black and you’re just left staring at your half-asleep Jabba-the-Hut face thinking ‘what have I become?’ Of course you do. We all do. Don’t be that guy. Suggest some free activities, put on some clean pants and take a mental health day.
8. Nothing
Who says it: 99% of companies hiring (or at least it feels like that sometimes)
Why it sucks: You composed the perfect cover letter, triple checked your resume, stalked your old bosses for references – you’ve put everything into the application, and moreover, put yourself out there. Hearing nothing back from a hiring manager after all that is like your crush responding ‘haha’ to the text you and your friends spent hours crafting. It’s a disappointment that throws off your whole game.
What to do: Get back out there. Unfortunately, not every company you apply to will respond to your application – even more frustratingly, sometimes you may not even hear back after an interview. This isn’t necessarily because of something you did wrong – the hiring manager may be inundated with applications and having a hard time getting through them all, or maybe they have a very slow hiring process and just haven’t responded yet. Here are some tips to help avoid getting ghosted if you think your game may need a little work, but the best thing you can do is follow up politely and keep trying.
